I've been receiving an escalating, and frankly alarming amount of news via e-mail and from people I know in person of people impersonating me online -- through e-mail and instant messaging conversations, Twitter, Facebook and the like. Most of these impersonators do it merely to draw attention to themselves. Some do it to exploit people, which really isn't cool.
A few weeks ago I was sent an e-mail by somebody accusing me of the theft of dialogue and plot elements from a story he had supposedly written in private collaboration with both a friend of his and "me" (it wasn't me). I told the sender that was impossible. He said he had proof. I said I'd sure as hell love to see it. He sent me a number of desktop screenshots which proved a little less than jack shit, but one of the images displayed his e-mail inbox which was filled, quite eerily, from top to bottom from somebody named "Jon Graham". A couple more of the images revealed the sender's conversations with Bizarro Jon, who was indeed pretending to be me, giving his opinions on "his" own work and offering advice on writing.
I was then sent the story itself that I had supposedly stolen from. I quickly went through it, and the dialogue in two relatively small sections of it were ripped directly from season six's second last episode, Severance (Kylie's conversation with her bodyguards on Spire, and her and Arbiter facing off on Zealot).
As I clearly remember both where I was when I wrote those scenes and the strain I was under trying to get them written down (which made this news particularly irritating), what must have happened was somebody watched Severance, pasted them into a document and took the time and energy to weave a completely alternate narrative around that pasted material with the intention of either blackmailing me or just pulling my pisser.
The sender of the e-mail also told me that he had been talking with Bizarro Jon frequently for months. Some of these impersonators are disturbingly dedicated. I felt bad, but I think a lot of blame lies with the sender for thinking Bizarro Jon's wacky, numbery (and, on my Blog, unlisted) Yahoo e-mail address was legitimate.
To those people, get a life, seriously -- and I don't even mean that in a colloquial and derogatory way, I mean literally, get your own life. I'd like to draw your attention to the lack of any sort of reward for drawing attention to yourself when it's completely unearned (besides a little social interaction, in which case go the fuck outside), not to mention the ill reasoning of trying to take the life of somebody who doesn't even have one.
There's currently a Facebook fan page with five thousand or so members which I'm completely unaffiliated with. It has been under the administration of several users throughout its operation, I believe, and a couple of them have used it to extort people; posing as me claiming that my Xbox is busted and that "I" need donations for a new one to keep the show going.
If any impersonators attempt to extort you like that in any way, that should be your first clue that they're not who they say they are. I'm never gonna be asking anybody for money or shit like that.
A few people I know in person have been following "me" on Twitter for months. How surprised they were when I told them I don't even have a Twitter account.
Yes, that's right. I don't have a Twitter account. I know some of you may have been following somebody who is supposedly me for some time now, which is going to make it difficult for you to swallow the fact, but it's true. I don't have one; I never have. If you're following a Jon CJG on Twitter, it's not me, no matter how much the impostor tells you otherwise (and some unsheath their claws and really fight back if their guise is threatened, desperate to maintain the flow of attention they're getting, and will say anything to convince you). Tell them to get fucked.
If you're receiving any sort of communication from somebody posing as me and the sending address or account or profile or whatever isn't listed on my Blog, don't believe a fucking word of it.
That's all for now. Hope you enjoy tomorrow's short.
P.S. Haha, just came across a much, much older blog post of mine after writing this one saying how much Twitter sucks, for no reason. I was such a cockmuncher. Although I still don't have a Twitter account, but that's only out of laziness.